My children idolise their dad. He isn't home as often as I am and doesn't spend as much time with them as I do, plus he also plays the good guy when he is with them. It's only natural they they adore him.
My youngest child told me the other day that they love dad more than me. I told them "I know" in my super understanding voice and that was that. Sure there was a small part of me that felt hurt.
At the same time I know I am the matriarch in my family.
My children look up to me and they respect me. I know this because sometimes when dad is telling them to stop doing something they'll continue until I walk in the room. Then they'll stop what they're doing straight away without me having to say a word. They know I will back their dad and I say what I mean and mean what I say.
It's a situation where, when they're older and have their own children, they will be able to look back at the lessons I've taught them and be thankful. They'll be thankful because they're not prats or brats or wallowers or whiners. They understand the reasons behind being taught right from wrong and how this helps them later in life. They understand the love behind the compliments and the caring, the spending time with them and their special bedtime routines.
I've had people see me in action, hear my words and my rules and assume I am too strict a parent and that my children will grow up to resent me. Thankfully I have proof, older children I've raised, who are testament to how productive and beneficial my way of parenting is. I'm also surrounded by mothers who raise their children differently and struggle in every day life to get their children to behave (mothers who sadly won't take or don't want advice, or those who don't realise there is a better, more easier way to get better behavior from your children).
It is our job as mothers to be the leaders of the family. Dad may be the bread winner (in my home anyway) and he may wear the pants (literally) and be good at a great many things (which he is), yet it is the mother and her strength and wisdom that children grow up to admire.
My children look up to me and they respect me. I know this because sometimes when dad is telling them to stop doing something they'll continue until I walk in the room. Then they'll stop what they're doing straight away without me having to say a word. They know I will back their dad and I say what I mean and mean what I say.
It's a situation where, when they're older and have their own children, they will be able to look back at the lessons I've taught them and be thankful. They'll be thankful because they're not prats or brats or wallowers or whiners. They understand the reasons behind being taught right from wrong and how this helps them later in life. They understand the love behind the compliments and the caring, the spending time with them and their special bedtime routines.
I've had people see me in action, hear my words and my rules and assume I am too strict a parent and that my children will grow up to resent me. Thankfully I have proof, older children I've raised, who are testament to how productive and beneficial my way of parenting is. I'm also surrounded by mothers who raise their children differently and struggle in every day life to get their children to behave (mothers who sadly won't take or don't want advice, or those who don't realise there is a better, more easier way to get better behavior from your children).
It is our job as mothers to be the leaders of the family. Dad may be the bread winner (in my home anyway) and he may wear the pants (literally) and be good at a great many things (which he is), yet it is the mother and her strength and wisdom that children grow up to admire.
I am happy to say I am that mother for my children and I wish all children could have the same loving and respectful matriarchal figure in their world.
Are you that type of mum for your child/children?
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